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'How do I salvage the situation after an uneasy business expense?'

I recently submitted an expense report following a routine trip to Frankfurt. Instead of attaching the total bill, I mistakenly attached a fully itemised printout. Unfortunately, this was returned to me, copied to my boss, with one item – “Private Room Entertainment: Adults Only Movie” – highlighted as an illegitimate business expense. I ordered the film more out of curiosity than habit and am usually meticulous over my expenses. I work in the finance department and am a loyal and trusted employee. The form was seen by my secretary, though, and I am anxious that it may become a topic of conversation with her lunchtime colleagues. How do I salvage the situation?
Manager, Male, 43

Lucy's Answer

I can guarantee that even as you were e-mailing me the details of this sorry problem your secretary was in a huddle with her lunch companions laughing about it. Yet equally I bet she has stopped by now. There is only so long that one can go on laughing at the fact that someone has watched a porn movie in a hotel and tried to put it on expenses, as it really isn’t all that funny – or that unusual.

Some US studies show that 70 per cent of men look at porn once a month; about 15,000 movies are made each year and it is a wonderfully profitable line for business hotels.

It’s telling that you don’t seem at all worried about your boss’s attitude to this – perhaps because you assume that he watches them too?

The only way in which this could damage you is if your secretary thinks you are a creep already. Then she can refuse to let this die. But in that case the movie is the least of your problems.

What interests me more is your attempt to shirk any blame. You say you only watched out of curiosity. You say how well-respected you are and how honest with your expenses. Your protests aren’t terribly convincing. I suspect you are just averagely backsliding – you sometimes watch porn, and sometimes put in very marginally padded bills.

Perhaps you can take comfort from the fact that your expenses system is working well enough to pick this up. Once you’ve paid I suggest you forget all about it and concentrate harder on being the employee you think you are already.

As a PS, I’m slightly surprised that the hotel put this on the bill – they are usually more discreet. Be grateful they didn’t go the whole way and write the title of the film on the invoice. That really would have given your secretary something to laugh about.

PS I adore Lucy Kellaway